Chapter 1
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| YOSI BEN YOCHANAN OF JERUSALEM SAID: LET YOUR HOUSE BE OPEN WIDE; AND LET THE POOR BE MEMBERS OF YOUR HOUSEHOLD; AND DO NOT ENGAGE IN MUCH GOSSIP (sicha) WITH ONE'S WIFE. THIS APPLIES EVEN TO ONE'S WIFE; HOW MUCH MORE THEN TO YOUR NEIGHBOR'S WIFE HENCE THE SAGES SAY: WHOSO ENGAGES IN MUCH GOSSIP WITH WOMEN BRINGS EVIL UPON HIMSELF, NEGLECTS THE STUDY OF TORAH, AND WILL, IN THE END, INHERIT GEHINNOM. |
Yosi Ben Yochanan is reminding his students that the first quality worthy of emulating Abraham is "hachnasos Orchim"... welcoming guests. To make a stranger in a foreign environment feel at home and to be wanted is the greatest mitzva.
It is, of course, much nicer to have "fine" guests at your table... but the Teacher insists... Let the poor be members of your household! What a lesson for children to see and learn. When father brings home and makes welcome a poor, dejected man who needs more that a few dollars, but a new spirit to raise him from dejection... no book lesson in ethics can match that living example of kindness and empathy that will lie indelibly etched in the heart of a child.
There are two ways to help a stranger, a poor man. One can take out a few dollars and send him on his way. With that he will most certainly fulfill the mitzvah of tzedaka. But he can also open his door wide and welcome him in to join him at his dinner table. That's more than tzedaka. That's G'milas chasadim. That's heart!
The badge of the Jew bequeathed from Father Abraham is "Hachnasas Orchim"... welcoming guests. The Midrash relates to us that Avraham Avinu pitched his tent at his crossroads and that it had four entrances, so that when strangers passed by they were always made welcome by this unusual host, Abraham.
He offered them food and drink, gave them a place to rest, and he taught his son Ishmael, by example, to do the same. When they thanked him he would reply... Thank Hashem, creator and provider for all the living. In this manner, by the force of his personality and dedication to his mission he created new souls, opened the eyes of the world to the concept of a universal benevolent G-d.
References: Torah's injunction to treat the Egyptian kindly because you were a guest in his land.
The Hebrew for POOR is "anee'yim." Others read that word as "a'na'vim," meaning humble.
Yosi Ben Yochanan is advising... let "a’na’vim" be the attributes of the members of your household. Let the members of your household act with humbleness... not haughtiness. The way to make a stranger or guest feel that he is really wanted and welcome is to put yourself in his place as the guest. The guest is more usually timid, reticent and even shy. Let the members of your family display the same kind of sensitivity and ease the stranger into comfort and acceptance.
The subject of discussion, sicha is "chatter" or "insignificant talk." Yosi Ben Yochanan is addressing those kinds of situations where a man comes home and reports to his wife the disagreements, fights or verbal battles he may have had with someone. What is he causing by bringing home and relating the pettiness of his encounter?
He creates animosity buildup in his wife towards another, thereby involving her in his encounter, where she only knows part. He causes her pain, and even causes a diminution of himself in his wife's eyes as she reacts to his ill-success in beating his opponent. This is not what we seek.
The words of Yosi Ben Yochanan are not to be taken to mean that a man is not to discuss matters concerning themselves, their children, education, finances and their home. Quite the contrary... the Talmud is replete with admonitions to the husband... "If your wife is short, bend down and listen to her"... "Bracha is found in a man's home ONLY because of his wife"... Chapter 31 of Mishli, Proverbs, contains the whole selection of the Ayshes Cha'yil, dedicated to the description of the Woman of Valor... whose husband's heart trusts in her...who cares for his business, children and home.
No culture has raised the position of the woman as high as Torah has. When Hashem created woman, the Torah describes it by the use of the word "va'yi'ven"... He built... the rib into a woman. The word "va'yi'ven" has the root "ba'no"... which is also the root for the word "bi'na," understanding. Our Rabbis observe that the Torah is telling us that Hashem created woman with an additional measure of understanding, beyond that of Man.
In addition to the previous admonition, we now have an additional factor. The Torah recognizes the frailty of humans. Sexual attraction is both a creative and destructive force in the life of an individual, depending upon the situations and condition. Torah has required then that both sexes minimize their contact with one another.
The construction of the Mishkan (Tabernacle) in the desert, and later, the design of the Beis Hamikdash had the Machaneh Shchina (area of the Shchina) where only the Kohanim functioned, the Ezras Yisrael, which included the area all males could enter, and the Ezras Nashim, the women's area. Family purity, genealogy, are so forcefully stated in the Torah. Holiness (kedusha) is the Torah's contribution to the Jew and to the world, and the Torah riles against the licentiousness, immorality and sexual looseness of the nations of Canaan, as a basic reason for their displacement by Hashem.
Therefore... Yosi Ben Yochanan advises... minimize contact with your wife... but certainly so with your neighbor's wife. The fruits of the breach of this guideline is so obvious in our world today. The blessings of its observance is the wholesome, beautiful, productive life that characterizes a Torah home.
What is meant by the terms "yetzer tove" and "yetzer ra"?
2.What does the word "ra" mean and connote?
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